Meraki - creativity, soul, love.

three years! right? or am I starting to lose track of numbers? I think three. 

anyway, super happy. but I have really no time to blog about it and stuff, so I’ll get back to homework and bullshit.

for a lot of reasons.

you’re always one of them.. but idk, occasionally we have off weekends. this was not one of them. we’ve clicked, all weekend. which doesn’t always happen, especially on long weekends.

i like that we still click.

Which is… at first scary, right? Like.. what else don’t i know!? but then it’s like… it’s never boring. there’s still more to learn. Reasons to have real conversations outside of  ’how was your day’? Makes me feel like we’re not in a rut, that we aren’t getting boring and lame and tired of each other.

I don’t know… there’s something poetic about it, maybe. In fact, I think I wrote about it in the past. Just when I think I know everything…there’s always something new.

Love it. 

and love you. <3

love him. 

In fact I’m really glad my non-stereotypical female self found someone like him to appreciate my strange ways. 

When we first started dating, I was a bit more tomboy than I am now, and he was way more metro than he is currently…and it still worked out.

He’s great, guys. everyone should be aware. ;)

NaNo means so much more to me than completing a novel. It’s not silly, it’s a personal victory. It’s a commitment to a project, it’s about reclaiming a part of me that architecture may have killed, and it’s about relearning myself and my personal history in the process. I fully intend to write about myself, my experiences, and my motherfucking life. We’ll see if that happens. I think I’ll start with college and work backwards…maybe I’ll just copy and paste all of my tumblr blogs into it, and we have a solid chapter right there! Or maybe I’ll ramble about nothing like I always do. Maybe I’ll write it all in tumblr so you can all see how crazy I actually am.

I haven’t written…in so long. I think I’m self-conscious. I haven’t played soccer in a very long time either and I feel weird about that. I don’t even read! Other than Twitter, which never counts.

October is my birthday month, but November is mental health and reconstruction month. I’m going to make a year-end resolution to do more things that I actually enjoy, and stop taking on projects that I don’t have to do. More “me” time, as if there isn’t enough. Maybe at the cost of skipping class, maybe not. Maybe less sleep? Maybe…I don’t know what else there is! I can’t give up social interaction, because I don’t have any! And obviously I can’t work less. So, less sleep it is. I’ll sleep less, but read more. And be happier? Who actually knows the answers to any of my questions? 

And just like that, we’re closing in on the three hundred work mark. Almost. Ok, so we’re already cheating the word count…

Only one billion more to go.

its nights like tonight…that i know we’ll be together forever.

at least i hope so. that’s my plan, anyway. 

=]

came to a realization tonight.

a very important one, with the help of old/new friends? old architecture friends, who i’ve become better friends with this year.

i wasn’t meant for architecture. 

i’m so much happier this year - whether its living arrangements, or the new change in my life…i’m busy and stressed, but good stress. the kind of stress that keeps depression away. the kind of busy-ness that keeps me motivated and appreciative for the free time when i get it. 

and architecture…I miss it’s challenges, the problem-solving, the skills it gave me…but maybe i really couldnt handle it. 

i wouldnt have been able to take the amazing opportunities i have with my current jobs… and i really love these opportunities.

good day, friends… now goodnight!